Roses Aren't Just Red
by NaruSasu-Perfection
Summary: Kanda Yuu X Reader. AU - College. Kanda starts to like this girl and goes through a series of emotions and feelings while he is getting to know her.
1. Chapter 1

******[Author's Note:** This is a series of drabbles I've put together. It is going to end up being three parts in total. Each drabble is based off a different color of a roses. I hope you enjoy!**]**

* * *

**One: **_**Lavender – Love At First Sight**_

Kanda has never been one for history. He prefers sciences or a good math course, because he has always found history boring. He doesn't like memorizing all the dates. He doesn't care to know all the people involved in this war or that war. He just doesn't care for history at all. He's more into formulas and numbers and stuff he can picture in his mind. He can't picture people fighting in a war hundreds of years ago.

It's the second week into class when he finds himself a little more interested. There is a transfer student. She had a problem with her schedule or something like that and had to switch into this class late. She likes history though. She answers questions and knows every date of every fight and can name people off the top of her head. She says she likes learning about the making of America –she was talking to Lavi one day and Kanda overheard - and all the wars they underwent to get where they are today.

He can't stop thinking about her after that first class. He sits in the back of the class, his pencil tapping his notebook in boredom as he looks at her. He watches as she smiles the whole class. He watches as she raises her hand to answer question after question. He looks away when she looks back at him when he is called on for an answer he doesn't know. He watches her when she laughs at something Lavi says.

He's never watched someone so intently in his life.

He's had a girlfriend before, two if you can include the girl who dumped him after two weeks for some reason or another. He just isn't into relationships. He doesn't go out with girls on a regular basis and likes to stay in his apartment on Friday nights no matter how much Lavi bugs him to go out. He just isn't into the whole dating seen.

She changes that though.

He wants to take her out and treat her to a nice dinner. He doesn't tell anyone this though. Lavi would make fun of him. Lenalee would get all mushy on him. Allen, the _myoshi_, would never let him live it down. He can only keep his thoughts to himself as he looks at her during class, watching as she answers questions enthusiastically. He doesn't even know how to ask her out anyway. He doesn't even know if he could get the words out.

"Hey, Yuu-chan." Kanda turns his glare toward Lavi, his eyes narrowing when he notices the look on Lavi's face. He doesn't like that smirk. "You should ask her out." Damn rabbit.

"What the fuck are you even talking about?" Kanda grumbles. He doesn't need the idiot knowing he likes [name]. He isn't going to be able to live it down. Lavi doesn't say anything else though and that irks him. He doesn't know how to take the idiots silence, but he knows Lavi thinks something is up.

He isn't sure he cares what Lavi thinks when [name] turns her smile toward him.

* * *

**Two: **_**Yellow – Friendship**_

He doesn't know when he ended up letting Lavi become his best friend. He doesn't know why he even let Lavi but into his life in the first place. He regrets it more often than not and right now, he was regretting it one hundred percent.

Lavi was standing in the middle of their shared apartment with [name]. He was showing her around and the last stop was the living room. He pointed to various objects and shows her various pictures Lavi had taken in the past - Kanda wasn't smiling in any of them. He pointed out little things Kanda didn't even know where there. Then, he pointed to Kanda.

"I think ya know Yuu. He's in our history class. He sits next to me in the back of the class. He often doesn't know the answers." Kanda's fingers curl and his nails dig into his palm. He almost gets up to punch the annoying redhead, but stops himself when he notices [name] glance at his tight fisted hands. He wills himself to relax. He tries hard, but his fingers won't uncurl fully and he can't get rid of the glare he is shooting at his roommate.

"Yeah, I know who he is. Doesn't he go by Kanda though?" [Name] asks, tilting her head curiously to the side as she looks back at Lavi. The redhead nods and Kanda drowns out his voice. He simply lets himself take [name] in. He never imagined she would be in his apartment for any reason. Actually he wonders what the reason in now. He won't admit that he wishes the reason was because he invited her.

"Kanda, do ya want to study with us? We are goin' ta study for that history test Friday," Lavi asks. Kanda draws his attention away from the girl and blinks when he meets Lavi's gaze. The look in the redhead's eyes tells Kanda that he did this on purpose. Kanda can't help it when his fist tenses and he is almost sure blood will leak from the skin any second now. He is itching to punch his so called friend.

He is about to say no, to yell at the redhead for being an idiot. He snaps his mouth shut when [name]'s voice reaches his ears. "The more the merrier. I've always liked to study with people. The flash cards are much more fun that way." She smiles at him and he almost wants to smile back, but he doesn't. He doesn't say anything for a long while. He just glances between Lavi and [name]. Finally, his eyes land on Lavi and he narrows them. The redhead gives him a cheeks smile and that confirms that this whole thing is planned. He's going to killed Lavi next time he gets the chance.

He decides not to say anything and just pushes himself up off the couch. He grabs his open books and shots Lavi a glare as he makes his way to the table. He notices [name] smile as she plops down in the chair across from him. He can hear her humming as she pulls out her books and his fist clenches. He lets it relax when [e/c] eyes meet his dark ones.

"Well, shall we get started."

They don't study for history long. [Name] ends up talking his ear off about this and that. He doesn't like that [name] calls him her friend before she leaves that day.

* * *

**Three: **_**Orange - Fascination**_

She comes over a lot after she declares herself Kanda's friend. He doesn't know what to make of it, but he isn't going to kick her out when she knocks on the door. Plus, more than half the time Lavi has invited her and blotted on him. That only makes him want to hunt down the rabbit and kill him.

When she comes over and it's only the two of them she does a lot of the talking. She talks about people, classes, family, her education, history. If she runs out of normal things to talk about like gossip –she is a big gossiper – she'll just start to talk about history. It is always her fall back. Kanda knows what her favorite battle is, who her favorite general is and why, and who her favorite present of American is. She can talk and talk and talk about history.

He gets annoyed pretty easily, but he tries not to show it. He likes her enough, but her going on and on about his least favorite subject is not something he likes. He learns to tolerate it though. He sometimes lets his mind wonder in and out, getting the important pieces of the conversation or sometimes, on rare occasions he will ask her a question that will steer her away from history and to the present. It's hard for him to think of questions though. He's never been a big talker and thinking up question to learn more about someone has never been in his interest before. It isn't that he doesn't want to learn about [name], he does, but he isn't going to admit it out loud.

He finds her little obsession with history interesting. He learns about why she likes history so much. It takes a while for the subject to come up, but eventually it does. She tells him that her parents are both into history, her mother a professor at another college and her father a historian, so it is simply in her blood to like history. She learned a lot from her parents about history and she goes on and on about what she learned. This is when he doesn't mind talking about history. This is more about her own history rather than some random country's history and he can live with that. Actually, he likes learning about her past. He's never liked learning about anyone's past before.

He hates the days Lavi joins them. Lavi and [name] will sit on the couch. [Name] will be on one end, a smile on her lips and Lavi will be on the other end nursing a cup of coffee. Kanda often finds himself in the little arm chair to the right of [name]. He doesn't mind it when the two of them talk, but he doesn't like how friendly they are with each other. They talk for hours on end sometimes and a lot of their conversations revolve around history and Kanda doesn't like that they have that in common.

He isn't going to voice his thoughts though. He isn't going to tell Lavi to fuck off and leave him to [name]. He isn't going to tell [name] he is likes her, but doesn't want to listen to her extensive knowledge of history. He isn't going to tell Lavi how much he wants to punch him in the face. He isn't going to complain when they start to talk about history together.

He zones out a lot when they start on history, but some things snap him back to reality. This time it was Lavi. He is just looking at [name], his one green eyes bright with mischief. Kanda doesn't know how the conversation turned to this specific topic, but when Lavi turns an evil grin toward Kanda, he knows it was all Lavi's doing. "So, [name], do you like anyone?" [Name] nearly chokes on her water.

"I-I….um… I- No…maybe. I'm not telling you!" It takes her a long time to stumble over the words, but she finally manages it. Kanda can make out the blush on her cheeks. He likes the little bit of pink that dusts her cheeks. It gives her face a bit of color that isn't normally there. "Can we talk about history again?" He wishes she would answer the question.

"Of course!" He wants to punch Lavi.

* * *

**Four: **_**Blue – Extraordinary**_

He isn't sure when he stopped caring that [name] showed up at his apartment every day. It has to be sometime at the end of the semester. She claims that because they are friends now they should hang out all the time. He isn't so sure about this at first, but eventually he just gets used to her being around like he got used to Lavi being around. The only difference is it was a lot easier to get used to [name]'s presences than it was Lavi's.

She helps him so much in history that he actually considers taking another class with her the next semester. It takes a lot of whining on her part, but he finally does agree to take it just to make her happy. He doesn't remember the last time he wanted to make someone happy. He's pretty sure he hasn't wanted to make anyone happy in his life. [Name] just goes against everything he believes in and he isn't sure how to take it.

He thinks about her when they aren't together. He actually listens to everything she says when they are together. He doesn't even listen to everything Lenalee says when she talks. He likes it when she sits across from him on the couch, her foot just barely brushing his thigh when she stretches out her leg. He likes looking into her [e/c] eyes that hold so much emotion. He hasn't ever enjoyed these things before.

Lavi makes fun of him a lot for it. No matter how much he says he doesn't like [name] and throws swears at the redhead he won't shut up. This is why he didn't want to tell the idiot rabbit. He's thankful Lavi doesn't tell Lenalee and the _Myoshi_ about his little crush though. He doesn't need those two butting into his life. The _Myoshi_ already teases him enough. He doesn't need to give the teen any more reason to make fun of him.

His thankful thoughts of silence about his little crush are soon whipped from his mind. [Name] comes over the same day that Lavi invites Lenalee and Allen to hang out. Kanda could almost bash Lavi's head in, but he doesn't, because the rabbit didn't know she was coming. She normally comes uninvited now because Kanda is always around to let her in.

By the end of the introductions the _Myoshi_ is already making fun of him. Kanda nearly punches him, but [name]'s fingers wrap around his clenched fist and she stops him before he can do anything rash. She looks pretty fed up with Allen's teasing as well, but doesn't say anything. She just puts a smile on her face and keeps up the conversation. She doesn't let go of Kanda's hand though.

Apparently Allen and Lenalee are staying all night or something. Kanda doesn't know or really care, but they don't leave and it is already eleven at night. [Name] looks nervous when she says that she has to go home. She obviously doesn't want to make it sound rude or anything. Kanda instantly agrees to walk her to the door. He will do anything to get away from his idiotic friends.

She smiles at him when they get to the door and he suddenly feels like apologizing for his stupid friends and there damn probing into her life. He hesitates at first, but eventually manages to get the words out. "I'm sorry about those damn idiots." He refuses to call them friends. "They are just….idiots." He really doesn't have another word to describe them unless he uses some swears, but he is pretty sure [name] won't appreciate swearing.

"No, that's fine. They seem nice. I'd like to get to know the rest of your friends. It can only bring us closer," she says. The statement is so nonchalant Kanda doesn't know how to take it. She pretty much just said she wanted to be close to him. That means she wants this whole friendship to keep up. "Thanks for letting me stay so late. I'll see you tomorrow so we can study."

He nods and doesn't say goodbye as she walks out. She waves over her shoulder as she hurries down the stairs. He turns to look out the window and curses himself when a small smile tugs at the corner of his lips.

That girl is something if she caught his attention like she has.

Allen never lets him live it down.


	2. Chapter 2

**Five: **_**Pink – Admiration for Beauty and Refinement**_

He doesn't understand why he always wants to look at [name]. He gets that she is beautiful with her long [h/c] hair and her perfect round [e/c] eyes. He knows everyone else probably thinks she is beautiful. He hasn't ever been one for looks though. Well, he has, but not in the whole I-want- to-date-you-because-you-are-hot kinda way. It's more in the way that adds to her personality.

She is such a bright person and that makes her even more beautiful. The way her eyes glow when she smiles and the little dimples on her cheek deepen makes him wants to reach over and kiss her. Her [h/c] hair bounces when she walks; swinging back and forth even if it is down. She is always energetic and ready to take on the world.

It's the little things that he notices too. She chews on her pencil when she is nervous during a test. She taps her fingers nails when she gets inpatient when someone doesn't know the answer – usually him- and starts to chew on the top of her pen. She shakes her leg when she is finished with a worksheet and no one else is yet. She twirls her hair when the teacher talks about something she already knows, which is almost everything. Those little things catch his attention almost as much as her beauty does.

He doesn't like that he thinks she is beautiful. He doesn't like that he wants to run his fingers through her long [h/c] hair and brush his fingers along her cheekbones. He doesn't like that he could look at her bright [e/c] eyes for hours without getting bored or distracted. He doesn't like that he notices every little thing that she does. He definitely doesn't like that he wants to tell her she is beautiful, which is something he would never admit out loud.

"Yuu." Said male turns his gaze to the idiot rabbit, narrowing his eyes at his so-called friend. He hates every word that comes out of Lavi's lips even more than before because now Lavi takes it upon himself to give Kanda advice on how to approach [name] with his feelings. It just makes him want to hurt the rabbit beyond repair. "I think ya should just do it. Walk up and kiss her right on the lips. She's gotta have some feelings for ya if she hangs round with ya all the time." He almost lunges over the desk to sock Lavi in the jaw.

"Screw you," he grits outs. "And don't call me that." He turns his gaze to the bored and starts to copy down the few notes he missed because of Lavi. He doesn't like that his eyes flicker to look at [name] on their own every once and a while. He doesn't like that Lavi seems to notices when his dark eyes turn to the history loving girl. He doesn't like the knowing smile on Lavi's lips that he wants to punch off his face.

"Yuu, you should just go for it." The class is dismissed, letting Lavi go on and on about the subject. Kanda grunts, his teeth grinding together in annoyance. Lavi follows him down the hall and Kanda doesn't care anymore. He spins around, his fist connecting with Lavi's jaw and throwing him back. Lavi yells as he falls to the ground, his fingers holding his jaw. Kanda shakes out his hand, pain throbbing through his knuckles. "What the hell, Yuu?!"

"Shut the fuck up. I don't want to listen to you. I don't like [name] like you seem to think I do and I wish you would just shut up about it. I don't even enjoy her company when she bothers me all the time." He knows his words are harsh and almost feels bad when he notices Lavi's jaw is already bruising and his lip is split. He frowns at the redhead. "Just shut up."

"Yuu, there was no need to punch me to get the point across. Now my face hurts." Lavi opens and closes his mouth a few times, but stops when he notices something at the end of the hall. Kanda turns around when he notices Lavi's eyes widen with shock and Kanda can't help the sad little thump his heart makes. He never wanted to see tears streaming down that beautiful face, but the site is right before him. "Shit." He totally agrees with Lavi.

"Is that really how you feel, Kanda?" He can hear her voice shaking and he doesn't know what to say. He can feel Lavi's eyes on him, wondering what he will do. Kanda can't be stupid enough to lose one of the few friends he has. The only problem is that Kanda can't find the words. He isn't used to being nice. He doesn't apologize. He doesn't know what to say to make this right. [Name] seems to take this the wrong way. "Okay, I see how it is. I won't bother you anymore." She runs.

He can't get her tear stained face out of his mind. He wants to go after her. He wants to tell her that he didn't mean what he said. It was all just for show, to get Lavi off his back. He wants to hit Lavi again for making him say that. He just stands there though. He looks at the spot she stood only seconds ago and his hands clench into fists.

He never wanted to know what her face would look like with tears streaming down her cheeks.

* * *

**Six: **_**Peach - Sincerity and Genuineness**_

Kanda doesn't know what to do. He can't bring himself to talk to [name], but he knows he has to at some point. He really didn't want to lose her, especially not to such harsh words that he didn't even mean. He needs to get her back somehow, but he has no idea where to even start. He doesn't even know how to be nice to people nonetheless how to approach someone and apologize for his actions.

Lavi tries to knock some sense into Kanda, but it doesn't work. No matter how much Lavi tells Kanda he needs to apologize, he still can't figure out how to. Lavi keeps telling him how much [name] is hurting and he wants to punch that idiot again. He wants to add a matching brush on the other side of his face. He needs Lavi to shut up so he can figure everyone out on his own. He has to sort out his feelings for himself, because he hasn't ever had these feelings before. He needs to handle them on his own.

He doesn't mean to run into [name] one day at the end of the history class, one of the last ones of the semester but he does. He literally runs into her. She falls on the ground and everything. He glares at her at first, because he doesn't realize it is her. When he finally processes that she is the one on the ground his gaze softens a bit and he sticks his hand out. He doesn't allow the frown to tug the corner of his lips down when she doesn't accept his hand. She brush off the butt of her pants and simply stares at him for a second, expecting something. She goes to walk away when she doesn't get it though.

Kanda's body reacts on its own. He didn't tell his hand to wrap around her wrist and stop her in her tracks. He didn't plan to ever do that. He isn't ready to talk to her yet, but now he has to say something. "S-so…" The words get stuck in his throat, but he pushed through it. "I'm s-so-sorry." He holds his breath as she looks at him, her lips in a thin line. He wishes her pretty smile would form on her lips.

"For what?" He doesn't expect the question. He thought it was obvious. It was a general sorry. It was for hurting her with his harsh words and for knocking her down. It was for taking so long to say sorry in the first place. It was for everything he ever may have done wrong to her. He doesn't really know how to say this. He chokes on his words and curses himself for doing so. He needs to stop being such an idiot. He can do this.

"Everything. I'm sorry for everything." She raises an eyebrow. "I didn't mean what I said before. It was only to get Lavi off my back." He doesn't like that he has to explain himself, but he actually _misses_ her. He wants to be around her more often and he only hopes she will forgive him, because he needs to be around her.

He can feel his heart hammering against his rib cage as he waits for an answer. He has never been a patient person, but right now, waiting for her to say something, he feels like he could explode waiting like this. She just needs to say it straight out. He just needs to hear it already. He notices she is chewing on her bottom lip as she thinks. He never noticed her doing that before. "I-" She pauses, taking in a slow breath. "I know. I forgive you. I know you didn't mean it. I just….I needed to hear it from you."

Kanda lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding. He doesn't know why she forgave him so fast. He thought she was going to yell at him, kicking and screaming as she tells him off. He didn't expect her to just forgive him on the spot. "Thank you." He doesn't know why he says it, but he does. He is just happy to have [name] back in his life. He doesn't know how she became so important but she did.

"I know, I missed you too." He doesn't know where she got that out of his words, but he isn't going to deny it. He missed her a lot while they didn't talk, no matter how much he doesn't want to admit it. He opens his mouth to say something, but the words get stuck in his throat and he shakes his head. He can't say something like that. He will lose his reputation if he starts saying meaningful things. "Yeah, you're important to me too."

His eyes widen, but he doesn't say anything. It's like she is a mind reader. He must be showing too many emotions on his face. He quickly puts his façade back on and stares down at the girl. He watches as her smile starts to stretch across her lips. It reaches her eyes for the first time since they fought. He could look at that smile all day. He doesn't say such things out loud though. "Can I come over? I miss talking to you and we have a final to study for." He missed listening to her talk.

"Che, fine," he grumbles. He turns on his heels and doesn't fail to notice a hand slip into his.

* * *

**Seven: **_**Black - Farewell and Sorrow**_

He doesn't like finals, but he gets through them with [name]'s help. She is always smiling and telling him to study and helping go over flash cards. He doesn't know how he ever studied without her help before. She is amazing when they study together. He ends up acing most of his finals because of all her help and he couldn't be more thankful. He doesn't tell her this though. He just grunts out a reply when she asks how he did.

He shouldn't miss her so much when she goes home for winter break. He's been away from her before, but never this long. He feels pathetic when she is only gone a weekend and he already wants to call her to hear her cheery voice. He doesn't though, because he isn't going to be weak like that.

Lavi has a little Christmas party with friends and family in their apartment on Christmas. [Name] can't make it because she has her own family to be with. He wishes she could come, but having a family is something he wouldn't want her to miss out on. The party goes by quickly and pretty much everyone stays well into the night. He doesn't so much mind. He has gotten used to his mismatched family over the years.

The door bell ringing around midnight is not what he expects. Everyone looks over to the door –no one has left yet – and just stares at it till there is a loud knock. Kanda furrows his eyebrows and gets up to go answer it. He knows Lavi won't answer because he is too busy with the eggnog and he wouldn't want anyone else answering his apartment door.

He is shocked to see [name]'s tear stained face on the other side. It only takes her seconds to process it is Kanda standing in front of her before she throws herself at him, her arms wrapping tightly around his waist. Her fingers fist the back of his holiday shirt – Tiedoll forced him into it – and her knuckles turn white. He has no idea what to do. He can feel everyone's eyes on him, wondering just what is going on. He would like to know the same thing. He finally resorts to pacing a hand on her head, patting her [h/c] locks before he lets it slip down her back. He doesn't know how to sooth people, but the hand yanks her into the apartment and he kicks the door closed behind him.

He turns a glare to all the people staring at him and each go back to whatever they were doing before. He pulls at [name]'s fingers, the ones gripping his shirt, until they are loose. He places both hands on her shoulders and leads her to his bedroom, a place she has never been before. He shuts the door behind them when they enter and is surprised when [name] wraps her arms around him again, crying against his chest.

He walks them over to the bed and sits down. He tenses when [name] sits herself down in his lap, her fingers gripping his shirt again as she cries. He doesn't know what to do. He deiced to place a hand on her back and he rubs it up and down her spin. He doesn't know if it is working, but she seems to be calming down. That has to be a good sign. It takes a long time for her to finally catch her breath.

She pulls her face away from Kanda's shirt –which is going to have to be cleaned with all the snot she got on it – and looks into his dark eyes. He can recognize the pain behind her [e/c] eyes and he isn't sure if he is ready for what it about to come. "I-It was an a-accident. D-drunken p-people and….c-cars off the r-rode." He knows what she means by that and he doesn't know why but he suddenly has her against his chest, a new wave of tears falling down her cheeks.

She cries for a long time after that and he wishes he could make the pain go away. He can hear his family having fun outside his door – it's about four in the morning now – and wishes they would shut up. That isn't going to help [name] get over it. It will only help her remember the family she lost tonight.

He doesn't know how long someone can cry, but he doesn't try to move her and comforts her by rubbing a hand up and down her spine. It seems to be the only way to sooth her and he has no idea how to comfort someone so he is just going to keep doing what he is doing.

"C-Can I s-stay here t-tonight?" He can't say no to that. He really can't. She is so broken and she's crying and he doesn't know what to do. So, he simply nods his head a bit. She crawls off his lap and onto the bed. [Name] curls herself up into a ball, sniffling as she pushes her face into the pillow. He is about to get up and leave, go say something to his family, but she grabs his hand, her tear stained face looking at him. "S-stay."

He can't say no to that.

* * *

**Eight: **_**Bright Pink – Gratitude**_

Kanda's family doesn't say anything about [name] sleeping over for a few nights. He's happy they don't. Kanda tries his best to comfort the girl, but ultimately he has no idea what to do about her. Lavi has comforted her a lot and despite the fact Kanda doesn't really like it, he is happy Lavi actually knows how to comfort someone. Lavi will chat with her a bit and keep her updated on things. When Lavi isn't with her, Kanda can often be found with the girl curled up in his arms, his hand running up and down her spin. No one says anything.

Kanda goes with her to the funeral and wake, because she refuses to go otherwise. He knows she will regret missing the funeral and wake in the future so he ends up just going. It's a bit awkward because he didn't know her parents and he doesn't know her family, but he is happy he is there when she starts to cry. He's getting better at the comforting thing and actually wraps both his arms around her this time, trying to block out the world for her.

He drives home, because she is in no condition too with all her crying. He doesn't even know if she can see because of all the liquid blurring her vision. He doesn't ask and he doesn't care. He just tries to focus on the road and ignore her sniffles and silent sobs. He can't very well comfort her while he is trying to drive.

She leans into him heavily while they walk up the stairs. He doesn't know what to do, but he wraps an arm around her waist and helps her get to the apartment. She goes right to his room when they get back and he doesn't know if he should follow or not. Lavi give him a sad head shake and Kanda gets a drink instead. Lavi knows better than him. Lavi must realize she needs some space.

He sleeps on the couch that night and he is surprised when [name] comes out late and curls up next to him. He stiffens as she buries her face in his chest, but wills himself to relax. She's done this before. This is just the first time she has done it while they are sleeping. He slowly wraps an arm around her and pulls her close. He doesn't know why he likes the warmth her body supplies.

Lavi wakes them both up with a happy smile. He gives Kanda this knowing look and hops his way to the kitchen to make some waffles. Kanda doesn't like waffles, but they know [name] likes waffles and after her day yesterday she could use them. [Name] slowly uncurls herself from her ball and yawns, her eyes red and blood shot. He is surprised when she turns her gaze toward him, a small smile pulling at her lips for the first time since the accident.

"Kanda, I just…thank you, for being here. I know it's gotta be hard on you, but thank you." The words are soft and she doesn't meet his gaze. He can see the small tint of pink brushing over her features and he knows she is blushing. "I….uh." He is surprised when she finally does look at him. She has this determination in her gaze as she leans forward. There is a light brush against his lips before it is gone. It still sent an involuntary _good_ shiver down his spine.

"It-… you're welcome," he mumbles. He knows his cheeks are probably getting hot too. The smile is finally reaching her eyes again and she leans forward bravely. He doesn't know what to do and nearly panics when lips are placed on his. They move tentatively at first, but she gains determination as she places a hand on his shoulder. It takes him a few seconds to process everything before he starts to move his lips against hers.

A pan falling to the ground startles them both apart. They look over to find Lavi is the door way, a pan on the ground which was luckily empty. He has flour on his face and a bit of the waffle batter in his hair. It seems to take him a second to process everything, but a wide grin slowly pulls up his lips. "I knew it!" He yells, whipping around a spatula neither of them noticed. "I know you liked her, Yuu!"

Kanda growls and is about to go in for the punch when [name] squeezes his shoulder. She gives him this soft smile and he suddenly wants to kiss her more than her wants to punch Lavi. He just watches as she moves in and presses her lips softly to his before pulling away. He would have preferred a longer kiss. "It was simply a thank you, Lavi. If Kanda wants it to be more than I'm all for it."

Kanda notices Lavi open his mouth to retort, but Kanda doesn't hear what he says because it is all [name]. She has his complete attention as he places his lips on hers. He just hopes she knows that this means more than just a thank you. He wants more with her. He wants everything with her. He isn't going to say it out loud though, especially not in front of Lavi. He is pretty sure the redhead is still blabbering away when the two pull apart, breaths short as they stare into each other's eyes.

"Hmm, I'll take that as a yes…thank God." Kanda raises an eyebrow. "I really didn't want to embarrass myself, but I couldn't wait any longer. I've wanted to do that for ages now and you've been so good with this whole….thing with my parents and I just thought it would be a good excuse to kiss you. I just….everything has been so crazy and you have been one of the only things holding me down. So, thank you."

Lavi is ignored as Kanda leans in for another kiss. The only thing that breaks them apart is when waffle batter is dumped on them.

This time, Kanda does land a punch to Lavi's jaw no matter how much [name] tries to stop him.

* * *

**Nine: **_**Dark Red –Readiness for a Commitment**_

Kanda doesn't know how to be in a relationship. They are barely together a day and he is already questioning himself. He doesn't know what to do when she hugs him. He doesn't know where to put his hands when she kisses him. He doesn't know if he is supposed to treat her any different than he did before. He just doesn't know what he is doing.

[Name] seems to notices after a few days, but she doesn't say anything. She just kisses him hard with reassurance behind every touch. She obviously wants this to work, but Kanda isn't so sure how it is going to. His past girlfriends – which only adds up to two – broke up with him because he was to distance. He doesn't want that to happen with [name]. He doesn't want to be distance and uncaring. He cares about her a lot actually. He just doesn't know how to show it.

Its two weeks into their relationship when he starts to pull away. He's never been good at handling people and this is no different of a situation. [Name] frowns when he pulls away from a kiss and simply looks at him for a few minutes. He feels uncomfortable under her gaze, but he doesn't say anything. "Kanda," she finally says. "Why are you so distant? I thought you wanted this too."

He swallows the lump in his throat. He doesn't like to talk about emotions and shit like this. It isn't something he would choose to do voluntarily. He chokes down his pride though, because this is [name] and he likes [name]. He can talk for her. "Che, I do." Kanda's voice sounds a bit colder than he would have liked, but [name] seems to understand. Kanda is obviously madder at himself than anything. He is the one who keeps pulling away.

"Why are you being distant then?" Kanda shifts his gaze to the wall, taking in the long scratch Lavi made ages ago when they first moved in. He doesn't think he can look back at [name]. He is surprised when fingers trace along his jaw and turn his head toward [name]. He looks into her [e/c] eyes and can see pain behind them. He feels bad instantly.

"I'm not – I don't know….I don't do relationships," he bits out. [Name] frowns but doesn't say anything as she places a soft kiss on his lips. He doesn't know what it is for, but he isn't going to complain. "I-" He doesn't know what else to say, but he hopes she understands.

"I know… I know. You haven't done relationships much before. I want this to work though. You have to stop closing yourself off. Is it that you don't want to commit maybe? You don't want to be tied down?" That theory just sounds ridiculous to him. Well, maybe it does sound a bit logical after he thinks about it a bit. He doesn't like having people in his life and you have a commitment in a friendship, one he hasn't ever wanted before, but that isn't the case with [name]. He wants that with her.

"No." He pulls her forward and wraps his arms around her waist as he kisses her. He hasn't ever held her this close while they kiss before. "I want_ you_." He doesn't know where that came from, but her smile makes him push aside his pride for a moment. He can say things that make her happy without thinking any less of himself. "I want this." He kisses her on the lips again and she giggles. He likes the sound.

"I'm glad….I'm really glad." She places her lips on his again and wraps her arms around his neck. There isn't another place he can think he would like to be right now. He is happy to have her in his arms kissing him. He wants to be committed to her and only her. He can't think of anything else he wants more.

He wants _[name]_.


	3. Chapter 3

**Ten: **_**Purple – Enchantment**_

Now that Kanda seems to be over the whole distancing thing he can't find it in himself to be apart from [name]. He knows he should want alone time, he cherished it before, but he just doesn't like the silence much unless he knows [name] is right next to him. She can often be found filling the little silences, but when she isn't and neither of them are talking, it is just so relaxing.

He also likes when [name] straddles his lap when they are on the couch. She will wrap her arms around his neck, making him totally forget about his school books and studying. She'll press her breast flush against his chest and he can't help but be mesmerized as she kisses him. He wants to touch every part of her body. He wants to know what her skin feels like under his fingers and run his hands through her silky [h/c] hair. He wants to kiss every part of her body and just hold her. He doesn't know how he held himself back before. He should have listened to Lavi and asked her out sooner.

"Kanda," she breaths as he places light kisses down her neck. He smirks against her skin and her arms tighten around his neck for a second before moving to tangle in his long hair. He loves the sounds she makes when he is pleasuring her. Her words are breathy and when she moans it sends all the blood rushing south. He never knew he could be so turned on by just the sounds someone could make. "_Kanda."_

He is just about to sneak his hand up her shirt when the door slams open. A loud squeal is heard and something hits the ground. The two college students move apart, but [name] doesn't move from Kanda's lap. Kanda growls when he sees the _Myoshi_ standing the door, his backpack on the ground and his fingers coving his eyes. "What the fuck do you want, _Myoshi_?" Kanda glares.

"Is it safe?" [Name] giggles and gives him the okay before he goes on. "Lavi said he would help me with some homework. He gave me his key. I wouldn't have come in if I was going to be blinded though." Kanda only intensifies his glare. [Name]'s hand on his shoulder calms him down a bit. She smiles and turns Kanda's attention toward her. She places a soft kiss on his lips.

"Allen, what subject?" She doesn't look at the boy. She can't seem to tears her gaze away from Kanda. "I might be able to help you if it is history." Kanda doesn't know why she offers. They were in the middle of something if he remembers correctly. He is about to protest when lips are placed on his again. The kiss is much too short for his liking.

"It is actually….but you don't have to help. I-I can wait for Lavi." [Name] shakes her head but doesn't look away from Kanda. She seems determined to help Allen for some reason and Kanda just wishes she wouldn't. He isn't going to tell her that though. He doesn't want Allen hearing anything he shouldn't. He doesn't need the boy teasing him for life.

"Just set up at the table I'll be right there." She waves over in the general direction of the kitchen table. They hear Allen scurry over and [name]'s lips drop, her breath on Kanda's ear. "We are going to have to finish this later," she whispers. Kanda nearly loses his breath when she releases a puff of air. She pulls away, her lips brushing against his jaw.

"I'll hold you too that." She presses one last kiss before she joins Allen at the table.

He really wishes the damn _Myoshi_ hadn't interrupted.

* * *

**Eleven: **_**Light Pink – Gentleness**_

Allen leave rather quickly and Kanda finds his back pushed against his closed bedroom door. He smirks against [name]'s lips and switches their positions. [Name] lets out this low moan, her body arching toward Kanda as his fingers run down her side, settling on her hips. He pulls back a bit, resting his forehead on [name]'s. They are both breathing heavily and he can't help the smile that tugs the corner of his lips up. [Name] smiles in return.

"I've never seen you really smile before," she whispers. She trails her fingers up his chest, a pleasure filled shiver running down Kanda's spin. [Name]'s slim arms wrap around his neck, pulling his lips down to touch hers again. It's only a light kiss and [name] pulls away with her eyes closed. "I've wanted this for so long now." The words are soft, air brushing over Kanda's lips. He nods his head even though she can't see his face. He has wanted this too.

Kanda lets his lips touch hers for a second and pulls back, letting his lips trail down her jaw toward her neck. He sucks hard on the spot he knows makes her moan, and smirks against her skin when the sound emits from her lips. He trails his tongue across the bruised skin and start to such on the skin just above her collar bone. She sucks in a deep breath, her back arching off the door. [Name]'s fingers tangle in Kanda's hair and he finds his mouth back on hers.

Kanda runs his tongue over the seam of [Name]'s lips. She opens her mouth slightly and he runs his tongue over her bottom lip, happy when she opens her mouth the rest of the way. His tongue dives into the wet cavern and he runs his tongue over hers, coxing it into a little battle. He can feel the corner of her lips pulling up a bit and he runs his tongue across the roof of her mouth before pulling away, saliva connecting their mouths. She smiles at him, her fingers tracing down the side of his face.

Kanda tugs her from the wall, running his hands over her hips to rest on her thighs. She seems to get his point and jumps up a bit, wrapping her legs around his waist. He pushes her back against the wall, one hand under her butt for support and the other on the wall next to her face. She places a soft kiss on his lips and pulls back. [E/c] eyes stare into dark eyes for a few seconds before lips are hungrily attacking each other again.

Kanda pulls her body away from the wall and walks blindly to the bed. He can't remember ever wanting this so much in his life. He was never the guy that had sex with every girl possible, that was Lavi, but he wants to have sex with [name]. He wants to pleasure her and make her feel good. He doesn't understand the emotions running through him as [name] falls back on the bed, her [h/c] hair fanning out around her head.

He takes a moment to take her in. There are a few bruises on her neck, some darker than others, claiming her as his. Her shirt is rumpled up, showing off her stomach. He doesn't know when the button on her jeans opened, but it is opened. He notices the flush on her cheeks, her skin hot to the touch. Her [e/c] eyes are dilated, lust shown behind those bright orbs.

Kanda places his hands on her waist, his fingers curling around the bottom of her shirt. He pulls the material over her head, taking in her flushed chest and stomach. He runs his fingers over the curve of her breasts, bending over to kiss the trail he just made with his finger. He smirks when she shivers under his touch, her fingers finding their way into his hair. She arches off the bed when his fingers circle her back and her bra is gone faster than Kanda thought it would be.

He takes a second to take her all in, his fingers pulling at her jeans. She looks up at him and their eyes meet. "I love you." The words are soft leaving her lips, said in a whisper. He doesn't know if he can say them back yet. He doesn't know if he is ready for that.

So, he simply shows her that he loves her too.

* * *

**Twelve: **_**Turquoise – Calm**_

Kanda has never liked cuddling. He hasn't ever liked human contact before. With [name] it is different though. She curls up next to him after they have sex and he can't help but wrap an arm around her waist and pull her closer. He doesn't mind the soft breath against his bare chest as she falls asleep next to him. He doesn't mind it when his own eyes start to close and he quickly drifts off to sleep as well.

He wakes up before her the next morning and can only marvel at how beautiful she is. He hopes one day he will be able to tell her that. He hopes one day he'll be able to tell her that he loves her as well. He hopes she already know he does. He just can't say it yet.

[e/c] eyes blink open and the small smile that tugs the corner of his lips up can't be stopped. She smiles back at him, sleep still covering her features. He watches as she brings her palm up to her eyes and digs it in, trying to wake herself up a bit. A yawn leaves her lips, her eyes closing for only a second until their eyes meet again. She reaches out a hand, running her fingers along his jaw. She lets her hand fall on the pillow and leans forward to connect their lips in a sort kiss.

"Thanks for always being there for me," she mumbles. He watches as her eyes close again and she snuggles back into his chest. He doesn't know why she said that, but his arms wrap around her waist and hold her as close as possible. He doesn't want this moment to end. He doesn't want to face the outside world just yet. He wants to stay in here with [name] forever. He doesn't tell her though. He simply holds her tighter. He was always better at action than he was at words.

It's quiet for a long while after that. [Name] breathing evens out again and he can feel the small puffs of air hit his chest. He brings one of his hands up to run through her locks and brushes a few hairs behind her ear, giving him a better view of her peaceful face. He runs his knuckles over her cheek bone and closes his eyes, intent on going back to sleep as well. He doesn't care what time it is.

He is on the verge of unconsciousness when something slams on the other side of the door. He narrows his eyes and glares in the general direction for a second until he lets himself relax again, his eyes closing. The bang sounds again and he sighs. He eases his arms from around [name] and climbs out of the bed. He slips on his boxers and makes his way to the door.

He isn't surprised when he sees Lavi sitting on the wall across from his door, nursing a bump on his head. He turns to see Lenalee with one of her notebooks in hand glaring at him. Kanda knows what was happening just from the scene. He is about to open his mouth to yell at the rabbit when he remembers [name] is sleeping just behind him. He lets out a slow calming breath and glares at the idiot.

"Nice work Yuu." He lunges, ready to attack the defenseless rabbit. He lands a punch on his chin when a voice reaches his ears, taking all his attention away from the red-head and toward the door of his room. He finds [name] standing there, his shirt covering her as she rubs at her eyes. She looks lost as she gazes at him, a yawn leaving her lips.

"Kanda, why did you move?" She seems way too tired for someone who slept all night and morning, but he doesn't say anything. He just gives Lavi on last shove before he walks over to [name] and yanks her back into the room. She squeaks but doesn't say anything when Kanda slams the door, glaring dagger at the wood. "I think I can help your mood." The words are whispered against his lips before [name] pressed their lips together.

He quickly calms down as everything fades around him, all his attention on [name].

* * *

**Thirteen: **_**Red – True Love**_

She tends to get into these little ruts. She won't talk to anyone and just stares at the wall. She pulls her knees up to her chest and wraps her arms around her legs. She rests her chin on her knees and she just doesn't move for hours, sometimes it will last a whole day. Kanda never knows when they will hit, but it is usually on a special day, like a holiday or a birthday of some sort. All that matters is that he has to try to get [name] out of the ruts.

They are watching a movie when she gets into another rut. He doesn't know what sets it off, but it must have been the movie. She moves away from Kanda's side and curls herself up into this ball. She stares blankly at the movie playing in front of them and doesn't say anything. Kanda lets out a soft sigh and turns the horrible movie off – he hadn't wanted to watch it in the first place – and turns to look at his girlfriend.

They just sit in silence for a few minutes and Kanda contemplates what to do. He finally places his fingers against her cheek, running them along her cheekbones and down her jaw. She doesn't even flinch at the touch. He pulls his hand away and leans forward to place a small kiss on her lips. She doesn't react and he didn't expect her too. She hasn't ever reacted to a kiss in this state. He places his hand back on her cheek, his thumb running over her skin.

"[Name]." The words are soft and he moves a bit closer to her. She doesn't say anything. He takes her chin in his hand and turns her head to look at him. She doesn't even blink. Her [e/c] are blank, no emotions hiding behind those eyes. It pains him to see her like this. She has always been so bright and full of life. "[Name]."

He lets out a sigh and brings their lips together again. He pulls away, but stays close, his breath fanning over her plump lips. He closes his eyes for a second before opening them back up and looking into her blank orbs. "[Name], I love you." It's the first time he has ever said it to her. He knows that she must know that he loves her, but hearing it is a whole other story.

[E/c] eyes blink for a second and emotions are quickly flooding her eyes. He can see pain, happiness, joy, and sorrow all playing in her gaze before her eyes fill with tears. Kanda doesn't know how to react to tears. She always cries when she is sad. She has been crying a lot since her parents died. "Kanda," she breathes. Her hand is shaking as she brings a hand up to his face, cupping his cheek. He leans into her touch a bit and doesn't take his eyes off her. "I love you too. I love you so much." He knows the tears are tears of joy now.

She leans forward and touches their lips for only a second. She pulls away with a smile on her lips and he brings his hand up to whips the tears off her cheeks. He likes that smile. He has always liked that smile. He nearly smiles back when a teary giggle leaves her lips and she brings up a hand to cover her mouth.

"Kanda." He cocks an eyebrow. "I never thought you would say that out loud." He likes that he gave her a little shock with his words. Now he knows how to get her out of her little rut when she falls into one.

"It was the only way to get you to come back to earth." He surely isn't going to tell her he has been waiting for the right moment to say it for a while now. "You zoned out again." She just smiles at him, her eyes bright and soft. He can hear the little giggle escape her lips and it is obvious she doesn't believe him one bit. He doesn't care though.

"Thanks. I know it is hard for you to say that." She does know it is hard for him. She understands him probably better than anybody does and he couldn't be more thankful for that. So, he leans over and kisses her because that is the only thing he can think of doing. He surely isn't going to say 'I love you' again. One time is enough for a today.

Now, every time she gets into one of her little ruts he gets as close as he possibly can to her and places a light kiss on her lips before uttering the three little magical words. It doesn't happen as often as usual after a while, but the 'I love you's are always saved for those occasions. The occasions she knows he loves her more than anything. The occasions that he could just walk out on her and never come back, but doesn't. The occasions he chooses to stay with her and help her get through the tough times.

* * *

**Epilogue: **_**White – Loyalty**_

If you had asked Kanda if he would want a relationship with a girl before he met [name] he would have said flat out that he wouldn't. He had no interest in getting involved in a relationship and just wanted to focus on schooling and getting a good job that will pay well. That was always his answer.

If you have asked Kanda if he was going to fall in love he would just laugh at you. It would echo off all the walls just making fun of the stupid person who would ask him such a thing. Love gets in the way of everything and simply isn't worth it. There is no need for pointless things.

Kanda would have laughed if you told him he was going to be in a relationship and fall in love. He would have laughed so hard his ribs would threaten to creak under the pressure. He would have never believed you.

Now, standing in front of [name] five years later he can't imagine his life without her. She looks beautiful in her dress, her hair pushed out of her face and lip stick staining her lips. The dress fits her perfectly and her heels make her level with Kanda's eyes. He likes when she wears heels because it is easier to kiss her.

[Name] is making him go to the party. Lavi decided he wanted to have a little get together with all his friends and it turned out to be blown out of proportion by the idiot redhead. He wishes [name] wouldn't make him go, but she whined about it for hours until he couldn't say no anymore. He has a weakness and she knows it.

He doesn't miss it when [name] runs her fingers down her dress to get some of the wrinkles out, the ring on her ring finger catching the light. A small smile tugs the corner of his lips. It's only been a day since he asked and they plan to tell all their friends – no matter how much Kanda doesn't like calling them that – about their engagement. He just hopes the idiot rabbit doesn't jump him when he asks him to be his best man.

[Name] pulls him to the door, snapping him out of his thoughts. He grabs their coats and places [name]'s over her shoulders as she hurries down the stairs. She is obviously excited to go to the party. He just sighs and walks down at a more normal pace, watching as [name] bounces on the balls of her feet in anticipation. He wishes she would just calm down.

"Kanda! I wanna go! Hurry up!" He apparently isn't moving fast enough for her. With a roll of his eyes he deliberately slows his pace down, fumbling around for the keys in his pocket. He smirks at the little pout on her lips and kisses it away. He finally grabs hold of the keys and unlocks the doors, opening the passenger side for [name]. She nearly hits her head as she dives into the car.

Kanda shakes his head as he makes his way around the other side, pulling his door open. He does everything as slow as possible, just to tick her off. He fumbles with the keys and makes sure to drive a little slower than usual. She pouts the whole time and he can't help but chuckle a bit. She looks especially cute when she pouts, but he isn't going to tell her that.

The car isn't even in park when she leaps out, forgetting her coat and bag. Kanda grabs them for her and walks up the steps behind her. She hits the doorbell way more time than necessary and the door is whipped open.

"Yuu!" The annoying voice causes his fist to clench, but all attention is drawn away from Kanda when [name] holds up her hand, a bright smile on her lips. "Shit! I didn't know he had it in him."

Kanda was right. The idiot rabbit did jump him when he found out he was going to be the best man.

**Fin.**

* * *

**[Author's ****Note:** Well, that is the end! I hope everyone enjoyed the little series as much as I did. Thank you for all the wonderful reviews! They mean so much to me! Thank you~!**]**


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